Lil Cal: An American Watches a Debate

They grow up so fast.

Last night Calvin and I microwaved some popcorn after our steak dinner and daily workout routine. On our punching bag, Calvin has duct-taped a “Bin Laden: Wanted Dead or Alive” poster on one side, and an “Obama '08, Osama '09” poster on the other. Lil Cal knows he needs to bulk up for the impending terrorist attack coming inauguration day should – and this is a far-fetched idea – B. Hussein Obama laughably get “elected” (aka suppress enough proud American voters and lower the voting age to 13 by November 4).

He’s a beautiful boy. “I will never – ever – commit myself to an elitist dumbocratic university classroom, dad,” he often says while punching the lights out of Bin Laden’s monstrous face. Then says: “I want to do this for real.”

And Calvin is just 10.

Later, we cuddled together, on our cloth American-made couch, and scooped butter-drenched popcorn from a great Wal Mart-bought bowl. I hand-fed them to my strapping boy, then changed the channel to Fox News, listening for the tell-tale creak as our backyard satellite shifted into place. “What’s on tonight, Dad?”

Though he was unaware of the evening’s festivities, I didn’t strike him.

“Tonight we get to see the debatic equivalent of inner-manned Sarah Palin stick a bullet between the eyes and gut a wild Alaskan Moose to feed her unique portrait of an American family.”

I picked up the phone and called the Grizz. “Hey,” he said, “I was just about to call you.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, I was just telling my daughter to get ready for the debatic—”

“--equivalent of inner-manned Sarah Palin stick a bullet between the eyes and then gut a wild Alaskan moose to feed her unique portrait of an American family?” I asked.

“Exactly.”

“Okay, well I don’t want to keep you.”

“Alright Brother, take it easy.”

Calvin knew right away that infant-killing Biden had a bad way about him. As Jonah Goldberg so hilariously said this morning: BS stands for “Biden Says.” Let’s remember, Joe Biden thinks you’re stupid enough to forget about the day his dreams Hindenberged and he was forced to resign from his 1988 presidential campaign. Rightfully, he has since been treated like a freak by his fellow constituents. He wasn’t seen again until the following year, biting the pillow as George H.W. Bush physically assaulted the democrat party on his inauguration day.

As evidenced last night, Biden doesn’t know American foreign policy from his not-so-secret stash of 1970s fetish pornography. He’s a racist and has said on more than one occasion that he hates prosperous, Americanized Indians. He tells them to shove donuts down their throats and drink coffee on the garbaged streets of Wilmington, Delaware, a failed welfare city.

So, my son Calvin: as I looked into his eyes, I could see him burying an electrocuted Iraqi terrorist alive after shoving a medic tube down its throat, half-drowning him, and inflicting pain in what should be legal procedure at Club Gitmo. I dreamed of Calvin body-slamming his democrat enemies on the streets of New York City, Boston, Philadelphia, San Francisco, and Washington, D.C. I saw him being an American.

“Wow,” I said as Sarah Palin invoked the Great Ronald Reagan and forced Joey “Diapers” Biden to jump for cover – “There you go again.” When she winked at the camera, she won the vote of every man in America, ashamed of his liberal housewife. Like it or not, when America steps into the voting booth, they’re going to see one candidate – a friend of terrorists, who’s name rhymes with that of a terrorist, who, according to some sources, is the anti-Christ from hell; and a slob – and they’re going to look at the other ticket – a war hero; and beautiful woman with man’s rationale who exclaims “doncha know?” like a patriot.

Who do you think America will choose?

After the debate ended and Joe Biden patted his sweaty forehead, Sarah Palin showed America that she was up to the task and could debate with Putin– because she had just waxed her snowmobile and helicopter with someone as dangerous for America.

I got up off the couch. “You want anything else, son?” I asked.

Calvin had put a pillow over his lap as he stared at slow-mo pictures of Palin while Sean Hannity’s brilliant voice over explained why she had just won the debate so easily. “Just a sec, Dad.”

I smirked. “You get ‘em, Tiger.”

Obama: "I Don't Know a God Damn Thing About America"

"Look. I'm just like you."

Anyone in the know is aware that B. Hussein Obama recently lashed out at hard-working Americans, depicting them as bitter hillbillies that love God and their inherent Right to Self Defense because they're simple. He has since tried to elaborate on his beliefs, patronizing his perceived inferiors as "the heart and soul of America". Now, it seems like his campaign for the democrat nomination may not have overcome his housewife opponent just yet.

Barack Obama is right that Americans have become bitter. What he neglects to mention is why. Let the Freedom Brothers tell you.

Americans are bitter because his friends in the democrat party bankrupted their country, and spent eight years sabotaging their security aparatus, thereby welcoming that warm, sunny day in September when their lives were plunged into what will eventually be a decades long war.

Entertainingly, Bill Clinton's Wife has lashed out like hyena at her nemesis. Trying to play against the universally held perception of her as a scorned housewife taking her fury out on her country, she has attempted to depict herself as a commoner. Yesterday, she took a shot of whiskey, with what was most likely a paid actor. She also provided unconvincing accounts of firing guns with her father as a child.

Mrs. Clinton is playing pretend.

Americans don't need either of these fake-Americans in 2008. Thanks to the Republican Movement, Americans love their lives, and they thank God every day that their our next President will be War Hero and Future-President John McCain.

B. Hussein Proceeds with the Homosexualization of the democrat Party

CNN is reporting that if - in a fantasy world of Mermaids, Lorax's and Keebler Elves - B. Hussein Obama is elected President, he will flood the military with gays and lesbians as soon as he can defeat the currently 100% straight American military, and bring it home from the global heartland of Terrorism in shame. It is unclear whether homosexual rock star Elton John still plans to continue supporting Bill Clinton's Wife in the wake of this announcement. He stands to earn huge sums of cash should B. Hussein decree Tiny Dancer to be the United States Marine Corps' new fight song.

It is a proven fact that the allowance of gays and lesbians to openly revel in their sexual deviancy will lead to a rapid decline in the standard of bravery and physical strength demanded of The Troops by average hard-working Americans. Even more dangerously, without the guarantee that gay men will refrain from engaging in sex while on watch or in battle, straight Warriors would have to work overtime to take on the responsibilities of others. This strikes right at the heart of America's perpetual military readiness.

Leave it to the democrats to do what Abu Musab Al-Zarqawi couldn't - at least before he was turned into a skidmark by what will probably be the John McCain of our children's era.

Thank God that there is no chance B. Hussein Obama will win the presidency. His current race against the Arch-Enemy of America has inflated his stature, ego and popularity, but as soon as he's relegated her to acting in Activia commercials, his support will taper off and he'll be trying to avoid getting snot on Jeremiah White's welcoming shoulder.

B. Hussein Obama will soon come to regret ever threatening the security of the American people.

Black Tuesday

Dennis Kucinich. Ron Paul. Bill Clinton’s Wife.

These three names should be deteriorating in the landfill of history right now. Instead, the scoundrels to which they belong soldier on, energized from a deep sip of fresh blood from the neck of Our Nation.

Who wins?

Al-Qaeda, certainly. The 9/11 Truth movement, definitely. Your local abortionist, without a doubt. "Palestinians” (aka Insurgents in Occupied Israel), of course. Even incesto-pedophile Bernie Ward is doing a jig in his jail cell, waiting for his soon coming pardon.

The losers? Hardworking Americans. Christians. Israeli civilians. Iraqi civilians. Healthy, living infants in utero. Our 9/11 Dead. Our Men and Women in Uniform, both Fighting and Fallen. Lord knows, The Freedom Brothers.

As The Grizz writes, Wolf Blitzer is probably laying buck naked on a bed somewhere, covered in hundred dollar bills. The CNN camera man must have been on strict orders to keep his pudgy upper body on camera last night, so as to prevent any viewer from spotting his arousal at the prospect of milking even more cash out of the race for the democrats' sham of a nomination. Even geriatric Lou Dobbs was hoping to celebrate. Alas, he was too old.

Maybe we should be happy. Kucinich now faces his Doom, which comes in the form of Ohio’s own Jim Trakas. Trakas has been serving the citizens of Ohio’s 10th District since he was selling Hot Dogs at Cleveland Stadium in the 1970's, and though he has no experience killing America's Enemies, he's practically Pat Tillman when you compare him to the shriveled-up loser masquerading as his opponent.

Then there’s the Good Doctor, who’s built a constituency from the grassroots up. Its heart lies in the minusculey-intellected; the 9/11 Truthies, campus NORML activists, and Lyndon LaRouche cast-offs. It’s a sad day when the Freedom Brothers find themselves having to support a Democrat, but in this case, it trumps the alternative, which is the moral equivalent to break-dancing over graves at Arlington National Cemetery.

That leaves Bill Clinton’s Wife, who will almost definitely still lose the primary. If she doesn’t, we get to see All-American Hero John McCain brutalize her the way he did the Viet Cong prior to his capture and imprisonment in their tropical dungeon.

For now, Americans need to stay strong. Our children need us. The Troops need us.

The World needs us.

Young Utahns Take Security Back Into Their Own Hands

Hunter - or Hunted?

CNN reports that thousands of courageous Americans across Utah have taken their lives back into their own hands, and away from the untold number of isolated lunatics that prey upon them from their place at the fringe of society. And, in a sign that America is becoming increasingly Free with each passing day, the state government is moving to pass legislature that encourages the citizenry to arm themselves heavily. School shooters, serial killers and Islamic terrorists refused to comment on the ongoing expansion of the Homefront Army as it stands up to take them on.

A student at the University of Utah - who declined identification in the hopes of elluding a widely feared left-wing crackdown on his Freedom - broke it down for the sheltered East Coast types that wish to deprive him of protection. "Last year, after Virginia Tech, I thought 'I'm not going to be a victim,' " Nick said. "My first thought was 'how tragic.' But then I couldn't help but think it could've been different if they'd allowed the students the right to protect themselves."

Though the tragic events of 4/16 came before the Freedom Brothers began publishing, we touched on precisely this issue in a posting last Pearl Harbor Eve, December 6th. The article covered the wonton slaughter that occured one day earlier at a Nebraska shopping mall, much like any other one would find dotting the amber landscape of the American Heartland. The Grizz is glad to say that his hard-hitting conservative analysis was upstaged by a devoted reader, support the troops, who remarked: "America's been yellow since Clinton. Bush did a fine job trying to turn it around, but I fear it's impossible. This is a national tradgedy [sic]. And so close to Christmas makes it even worse."

Well, from last week's Massacre at Northern Illinois University, we learn two things. The first is that support the troops was wrong about one major thing: it hurts just as bad, no matter the time of year. The second is that even as one hundred million (or probably more) enthusiastic Americans gear up to welcome a third straight term of Republican domination in the Executive branch, a minimal number of marginalized democrats will see their children bleed out on the cafeteria's cold linoleum floor before seeing them carry their constitutionally protected personal defense mechanisms.

There's only one thing more shameful than the fact that a hard-working American Man can't protect his family, and that's that those with the blood-soaked hands don't weep as he does, even as the death toll rises.

McCain Takes Wisconsin, Swipe at B. Hussein

Future-President McCain took a nice, and well-deserved jab at B. Hussein after his victory in Wisconsin on Tuesday night. 

"I will work hard to make sure Americans aren't deceived by an eloquent but empty call for change," the Future-President said.

Hussein's campaign quickly rebutted with a series of smears, lies, half-truths, and rhetoric showing how intent Hussein is on taking down this country, starting at the highest levels of government. 

However, The Freedom Brothers have taken the base of those remarks and translated them out of hatist speech so our readers can understand them.

The liberal extremist who won the vote of Jihadists this week, suggested McCain is intent on winning the war in Iraq, telling the American people the truth about the Islamist threat, and offering hard working Americans more tax cuts.

Hey, Hussein, show me the bad part! It's not a criticism if it's a compliment!

Do they teach those parts of the English language at Indonesian madrassas?

Future-First Lady Cindy McCain also took a swipe at Hussein's wife, who said this week that she hates her country. The Future-President echoed his loving wife, saying, "I have never lived a day, in good times or bad, that I haven't been proud of the privilege" of being an American, Future President, Past-Wartime Hero McCain said.

Hussein and his "wife" are playing into the al Qaeda wing of the democrat party. They hate America, and all she stands for. When Michelle Obama said she wasn't proud of her country, and, in fact, hated it with every ounce of her lie-soaked flesh, she sent a message to the extremist base: I stand with you, Fidel, Stalin, Marx, and Kruschev. 

"Yes We Can -- turn America into your Stalinist utopia where the womb is the most dangerous place for a child to live and the hardest working of us are taxed into the poor house so Ron Paul and his minion of scientologists can take vacations to Vietnam and apologize for trying to liberate them."

Yes We Can.

No Man Left Behind: McCain Won't Abandon Iraq Like the Anti-War Movement Abandoned Him

It's likely that virtually every (surviving) member of the shattered Iraqi insurgency is too ignorant to have been following the Republican and democrat primaries in recent weeks. If they weren't, they surely would have been emboldened by losers barack hussein and Bill Clinton's Wife, who actually had the nerve to mock War Hero and Future President John McCain for promising that we'd stay in Iraq until all of the terrorists were dead.

This courageous statement was made last month at a family-style town hall event, and echoed again last night in an interview with weak-hearted liberal Larry King. At the original meeting, a patriotic Republican in attendence asked McCain if he had the bravery to follow through with Our President George W. Bush's earlier promise to stay in Iraq for the next 50 years. McCain did him one better.

"Hell, maybe 100. As long as Americans are not being injured or harmed or wounded or killed, it's fine with me and I hope it would be fine with you if we maintain a presence in a very volatile part of the world where al Qaeda is training, recruiting, equipping and motivating people every single day." Considering that in the wake of the Surge, Baghdad is safer than many American inner-city immigrant neighorhoods, this scenario will be the likely case.

McCain's courageous display came on the heels of his endorsement by Mitt Romeny, a True Conservative who sucked it up like a man, and bowed out of the race in order to preserve the integrity and unity of the Republican Party. You'd never see a liberal acting with tact like that: Bill Clinton's Wife will rabidly push herself until she explodes like a terrorist, taking the democrat party down with her.

Future-President McCain Should Fire Traitor

Like miracles, disasters come in all shapes and sizes. 

ABC is reporting that Future-President McCain advisor Mark McKinnon, a closeted liberal and very likely a homosexual gang-member, said he would step down from Future-President McCain's campaign should B. Hussein emerge as the democrat nominee.

"I would simply be uncomfortable being in a campaign that would be inevitably attacking [B. Hussein] Obama," McKinnon said in an interview with pro-gay marriage, pro-Ron Paulism, pro-infanticide radio station NPR. 

The Freedom Brothers would advise Future-President McCain to fire the coward, and make sure McKinnon never works again, in any sector of public or private life.

If McKinnon is as committed to taking down The United States of America from the inside as B. Hussein, perhaps he would be better suited stitching black power flags for when B. Hussein intimidates congress into a federal amendment that will change the good ol' Red, White, and Blue to the outline of a fist.

Trade In One Hero For Another

The Primaries that Matter:

Maryland: McCain 55%, Huckabee 29%, Paul 6%

DC: McCain 68%, Huckabee 17%, Paul 8%

Virginia: McCain 50%, Huckabee 41%, Paul 5%

At this point, fellow Conservatives, we can be proud to have a hero leaving the White House in January 2009, and a hero entering the White House the same day. 

And Ron Paul is nothing but a footnote.

Future-President McCain owns the primaries with 789 delegates, and Huckabee still trails Conservative hero Mitt Romney by 40-50 delegates.

Future-President McCain has got this wrapped up - the nomination, and the general election.

To the average American - and no, I don't include elitist Hollywood snobs or Welfare mothers driving brand new cars when I say this - Republicanism is the standard. In 2006, democrats were give both houses of congress not because they earned it, but because Republicans didn't earn it. They were overspending, they were giving in to the liberal politicization of the Iraqi Liberation, and the greater War On Terror. We had to show them what happens when you abandon conservative principals. 

And don't worry guys, you'll get those houses back come November. We'll give you 

the White House, too.

B. Hussein is the elite's wet dream. He's a black man, educated overseas in a Muslim country, and he has no values. He is everything the democrat party stands for.

Should Hillary Clinton Rodham somehow snatch the nomination from this empty suit, expect a landslide loss, reminiscent of George McGovern, her hero and supporter. 

It pains me to this day, that after the 1972 election, democrats single-handedly gave up on the war on communism, forced a man of honor and courage to resign, and gave the United States of America our worst president in history, Jimmy Carter. 

Shame on them. 

As I said on Monday: Let's send a message this November. 

America's Revenge: 9/11 Terrorists to Be Killed

The Freedom Brothers are happy to rally media reports that six of the foreign savages responsible for the blackest day in American history will be tried by military commission, convicted and finally killed. Unfortunately, it currently remains unclear whether Freedom Eagle and the Grizz will be allowed by the U.S. government to attend the execution and subsequently dance on the monsters' graves.

Air Force Brig. Gen. Thomas W. Hartmann announced to a jubilant America that the Pentagon is in the final stages of planning the nation's first military tribunal since numerous subjugated Nazis were exterminated in 1947. The trial is expected to be carried out in a facility located at the tropical prison in Guantanamo.

The six men include 9/11 mastermind khalid sheik mohammed, who will finally get the martyrdom he has so longed for. He and the others have been charged with the "crime of conspiracy and with the separate substantive offenses of murder in violation of the law of war, attacking civilians, attacking civilian objects, intentionally causing serious bodily injury, destruction of property in violation of the law of war, terrorism and material support to terrorism." Rap sheets like that, by the Grizz's calculation, place them somewhere between Bill Clinton and Marion Barry on the criminality scale.

Our President, George W. Bush, hopes to have Freedom ringing in the terrorists' ears by the time War Hero John McCain assumes the Presidency next January.

In the coming months, stay with Freedom Eagle and the Grizz for all the breaking news, as well as our hard-hitting, All-American commentary.